I ran across a site recently that posted some of the best one-liners parents had come up with when summarizing the frustrations associated with raising children.

 

A couple that will bring a smile to any parent's face:

-> Children are natural mimics who act like their parents, despite every effort to teach them good manners.

-> Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the drive before it has stopped snowing.

 

To be sure, the instances where children fill us with joy far outweigh those where we suddenly find ourselves swearing in foreign tongues. Such is the life we lead, filled with peaks and the occasional valley but always an interesting journey when guided by the frenzied screams of children.

 

Our family, led by the two tiny inmates, has seen a lot of change in the last few months. Those peaks and valleys that I speak of have passed at such a frenetic pace that comparing life to a roller coaster might be a fair analogy. Jess began work on December 6th for a company called Heidelberg, a large multi national that does something with printing presses. She endured 20 something interviews with recruiters and various companies to get the right job but seems happy to date.

 

Brennan and Sarah began daycare when Jess went back to work. Separation anxiety set in on both sides, with Jess lamenting the fact that Olon screwed her out of time with Brennan, while Sarah desperately clung to the hope that she could stay home with mommy ... or daddy if absolutely necessary. Every day she gets a little better but I expect the Christmas break, when she will be home for 10 days, to set us back and force us to start all over.

 

Brennan is a trooper and a pooper. The kid regularly takes a crap that spills out of the top of his diaper, and while most people find that disgusting I actually view it as a badge of honor. He is developing quite well and rolls around quite a bit, using his lateral movement capabilities like a drunk on a steep slope. He can get into things faster than a fat kid can bust into a bag of Oreos, so we must remain vigilant. He seems to think the bathtub is his own Olympic size swimming pool and every day is the finals in the 100m backstroke. He is quite the ladies man and apparently has picked up the 17 year old daughter of our daycare provider but hasn't quite figured out how to get to first base ... and NO, definitely not something he picked up from dad!

 

Sarah seems to have gotten the Canadian Idol bug. She will sing all manner of song but thinks that remembering the words is highly overrated ... apparently something she picked up from her mother. She is more affectionate each day and has taken to saying "I wuv oo" quite often. She is still obsessed with Dora, and if not for the fact that she can't drive, talk in full sentences or find her way to the curb let alone another country, I would worry about potential stalker tendencies I am seeing (Note to self: next time she calls Dora a "mala muchacha", for not responding to all the fan letters, we need to get her checked out ... and possibly put on medication). She also talks more Spanish than English some days and I have taken to referring to translation services to understand what she is saying - that Dora is in for a golpeo when I get my manos de mierda on her!!

 

Christmas is here and despite the fact that our credit card melted and had to be put on life support, I am looking forward to the inmates reaction on Christmas morning. To call this the "Year of Dora", insofar as Sarah is concerned, would be an understatement. That fat bastard in the red outfit, and no I am not talking about Ray in his unitard, better remember to bring her all the Dora crap he can carry. Brennan wants something to drool on and put in his mouth ... wait, that sounds like what any male would want.

 

So life trudges on. The kids grow, we stay tired and the beat of life is giving me an irregular heartbeat. Until next time ...