All parents with two or more children will inevitably draw comparisons between the older and the younger child.

 

If the older one was the spawn of Satan then the second child will be viewed in a favorable light, often likened to the incarnation of all that is perfect in newborns i.e. sleep well, eat well, no colic, can change his/her own diaper, can communicate using sign language, etc.

 

If the older child was "perfect" then the younger one has some lofty shoes to fill.

 

The problem is that we all forget that the seemingly perfect child is/was anything but. Relatively speaking their habits might have been more aligned to conform with what we think is ideal newborn behavior, but when we stop for a moment we remember that they also had some habits that pushed our patience to the limit. We then realize that each child is unique and we begin to embrace that uniqueness. Really, who wants kids that are carbon copies of each other?

 

However, embracing the unique nature of each individual means we take the ideal with the troublesome. And to be sure, the acceptance of this awareness is definitely called into question during difficult times, when we all long for the challenging behaviors of one child to alter so that they reflect the ideal behaviors of another.

 

On the weekend Jess and I found ourselves in just such a situation. Brennan is an eating machine, wailing for a bottle every 2 to 3 hours. As previously mentioned he is a grazer, meaning he will sometimes eat small amounts to satiate himself and then fall blissfully quiet just long enough to lull is into a false sense of serenity. Then WHAM, he strikes again with that fever pitched scream! You can practically decipher the "get off your lazy asses and give me a bottle" tone coming from the crying.

 

Jess and I fell into the trap of comparing him to Sarah and her relatively efficient way of eating on a regular schedule and for preset amounts. Not this kid ... 2 ounces, 3 ounces, 5 ounces ... there is no telling how much he will want to eat or when. We came to the realization that irrespective of how desperately we wanted him to mimic the eating patterns of his older sister he was not game. We started to look at alternatives.

 

On Saturday we decided it was time to start feeding him Pablum. The rationale was that solid food would tie him over for a longer period of time and help reduce the amount of formula this kid sucks back. Granted, most children don't advance to this point until 4 months of age but he is eating a LOT of formula and most kids aren't 12 1/2 pounds by 6 weeks.

 

He took to the stuff like a fish to water but we were surprised when, 2 hours later, he was crying for his bottle!! My first thought was "holy crap, you have GOT to be kidding me!" My second thought was that we were going to have to take out a second mortgage on the place when he is a teenager to pay for the grocery bill.

 

Jess started with 1 tbsp and then upped it to 2. He ate almost the full 2 tbsps and was STILL asking for more food a couple hours later!! At this point he will have to live with what he is getting because too much too soon can lead to some obvious complications. I briefly wondered if he is old enough to handle steak and eggs, which might be the only thing that would tie him over for a few hours, but Jess vetoed that idea.

 

For all of you out there that think Pablum is the answer ... YOU'RE WRONG!! I am hopeful our pediatrician might yield a nugget of wisdom when he goes in for his 2 month visit on Thursday but I am fairly certain we will be left to our own devices.

 

As we sat in the family room on Sunday and Jess fed him, again, she briefly shuddered, turned to me and said "can you imagine if I was still breast feeding!?!?" I had a vision of what it might look like to have Brennan duct taped to Jess' chest to simplify the ongoing feeding process but then quickly pushed that image from my mind and realized this too will pass.