Why won't the kid eat ALL his bottle in one sitting? Why does he force us to wait for an hour before he leisurely finishes off his bottle? These are the questions that have confounded scholars for centuries ... okay, maybe not the scholars but any parent trying to get a decent night sleep obsesses on such matters.

 

The fact is, we have a 'grazer' on our hands folks. Grazers are among us, even though they try and hide their shameful existence. You know the type - the person that eats every freakin' hour, mostly small amounts of food but just enough to drive the rest of the population crazy with their constant opening and closing of the fridge.

 

At first I thought this must be a genetic mutation, handed down by one of us, some recessive gene that precludes our offspring from finishing their meal in one sitting. But over the past few days I have been paying attention to the other three members of our little family and noticed that we are all quite content to satiate ourselves all at once. So this begs the question - what happened to Brennan? I can come up with only one logical answer - alien abduction and scientific experimentation.

 

I am confident that we can overcome this horrible little attribute that was implanted in our baby boy (DAMN ALIENS!!). Until that time, we shall remain sleep deprived and slaves to his eating whims.

 

I know what you are going to say - "have you tried a cold cloth", "have you tried feeding him in his diaper" - you name it we have heard it and tried it. The kid just blows us off and goes back to sleep. At least someone in the house is getting a decent amount of rest...